Siblin’ Friction
by Batdude365
Summary: After finally telling Ronnie Anne off, Lincoln now has to deal with another bully in his life that’ll take her place, but at home this time. (Save the Date AU; rated T, just to be safe)
1. chapter 1

[The episode starts out with Lincoln and his friends walking into the school cafeteria for lunch. However, LIncoln seems to be significantly annoyed.]

 **Lincoln:** [to the viewers] I'm not in a really good mood today, because every day around lunch, that Ronnie Anne decides to stuff random foodstuffs down my pants, because she thinks she hasn't messed with me during school _enough_. Last Thursday, it was Nacho Day, and...

[Cut to a flashback of Ronnie Anne pinning LIncoln to the wall, whilst pouring an entire container of nacho cheese down Lincoln's pants. She lets him go, for him to run around the school like his proverbial tail's on fire, snd she guffaws at this. Cut back to the present.]

 **Lincoln:** [cringes at said flashback] Let's just say my nether regions are redder than Lynn's jersey now, after that ordeal.

 **Clyde:** [offscreen] Buddy, are you coming?

 **Lincoln:** [to Clyde] Be right there. [goes over to his friends' table; sarcastically] Welp, let's see what'll be going down my pants today.

[A purple flash quickly passes by the screen, stuffing something down Lincoln's pants.]

[Lincoln sighs and reaches into his pants, struggling to pull out whatever was inside. It eventually comes out, being revealed to be a sloppy joe with a note.]

 **Classmate #4:** [reads the note] "Happy Sloppy Joe Thursday, Lane-o. Signed, Ronnie Anne. [says her name with flair]

 **Classmate #3:** And there's a heart!

 **Classmates #1-5:** Oooooooo! Lincoln's got a girlfriend!

 **Lincoln:** Wait, what?! What are any of you even talking about?! She's not my girlfriend! I don't even like her back!

 **Classmate #3:** So, when's the wedding day, Lincoln?

[The classmates (sans Clyde) laugh.]

 **Lincoln:** [sarcastically] Oh, hardy har har. _Real_ mature, guys.

 **Classmates:** _Ronnie and Lincoln sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G._ [start laughing again]

[Having had enough of his peers' mockery, Lincoln hops up onto the table.]

 **Lincoln:** [annoyed] How many times do I have to freakin' tell you all?! Ronnie Anne! IS! NOT! MY! GIRLFRIEND! In fact, if she were right here in this lunchroom, right now, I'll give her a large chunk of _my_ mind!

 **Clyde:** [to Lincoln] Now seems like a good time, Linc. She's right behind you. [points behind Lincoln]

[Lincoln turns around to see a moderately agitated Ronnie Anne.]

 **Ronnie Anne:** [to Lincoln] _So..._ What was all that baloney about giving me a piece of your mind, Loud?

 **Lincoln:** [hops off the table and walks over to her] Oh. I'm so _glad_ you asked. [clears his throat; takes a deep breath; enraged] I hate you! I hate every single thing about you! You do absolutely nothing but make my live a living nightmare 24/7! Day after day after day, it's punches, pantsings, and pranks! Regarding all that, people _still_ think that you and me are a thing. Guess what?! That _will_ never happen! Ronnie and Lincoln is _never_ gonna be a thing! In fact, I bet, on my white as snow hair _and_ my polo shirt that's as orange as the Nickelodeon logo, that my life would be a _lot_ better off without you in it! _And_ in case you didn't get it through that thick skull of yours... I! HATE! YOU!

[As she is taking in everything Lincoln said to her, Ronnie Anne then grows extremely livid, and grabs Lincoln by his collar.]

 **Ronnie Anne:** [livid] YOU WANT TO SAY THAT AGAIN TO MY FACE, DIRTBAG?! [raises a shaking fist in front of Lincoln's face] You know what, hope you saved room for _another_ sandwich! [about to punch Lincoln's lights out]

 **Lincoln:** [looks around to see a large crowd of people huddled around him and Ronnie; smugly] Yeah, that's right. Go ahead. Beat the living daylights out of me right now. _Right now_ , [points to the classmates watching the two] in front of all these students in the lunchroom right now. Do it, and prove to everyone that _I_ was right about _you_.

[As Ronnie Anne notices everyone around her and Lincoln (some of them even recording the whole thing on their phones), she remains speechless and feels very conflicted on what to do next.]

 **Lincoln:** [in Ronnie Anne's head] Go ahead. Beat the living daylights out of me. Prove to everyone that _I_ was right about _you_.

[Deciding to maintain her reputation, she releases Lincoln's collar.]

 **Ronnie Anne:** [threateningly; close to Lincoln's face] _This_ isn't over, Loud... [pushes and shoves her way out of the crowd circle and storms out the lunchroom]

 **Clyde:** [pushing through the crowd] Sorry. 'Scuse me. Gotta get to my best bud. [finally gets to Lincoln] Hey, Linc. I think you _really_ hurt Ronnie's feelings.

 **Lincoln:** [agitated] Are you saying you're defending the woman that turned my locker into a dump, left me exposed in my underwear, and embarrassed me with a whoopee cushion?

 **Clyde:** No, that's not what I-

 **Lincoln:** It's OK, Clyde. I was just venting a bit. But, I finally stood up to that bully, Ronnie Anne, today. And she won't be in my hair anymore after today, and that's all that matters right now. Besides, she'll be perfectly fine. [shrugs it off]

 **TO BE CONTINUED**


	2. chapter 2

[Later that day, Lincoln and Clyde are walking together from school on the sidewalk.]

 **Clyde:** I have a really bad feeling some kind of karma will get you later on.

 **Lincoln:** Come on, Clyde. What kind of karma? I end up slipping on a banana peel? I walk facefirst into a metal telephone pole? Point is, you're worrying too much, Clyde.

 **Clyde:** [thinks it over] Mmm... I guess. Well, see ya later, pal. [walks home]

 **Lincoln:** Bye. [walks off]

[Cut to LIncoln walking into his house, whistling blissfully. Suddenly, a rage-filled Lori dashes towards him, grabs him by his shirt, and slams his back against the front door, with steaming air coming out of her nostrils and puffing onto Lincoln's face .]

 **Lincoln:** [as his back's slammed onto the door] Ow! Lori, what the hec-

 **Lori:** [angry] CAN IT, TWERP!!! Now... WHAT! THE LITERAL HELL! DID YOU SAY TO RONNIE ANNE?!?! YOU MADE HER BAWL HER EYES OUT!!!

 **Lincoln:** What? [tries to break free from her grasp] How do you know what happened at school today?

 **Lori:** Bobby told me! [starts to bawl] RIGHT BEFORE HE BROKE UP WITH ME!!

 **Lincoln:** And _why_ would he care about any of this?

 **Lori:** [lets Lincoln go and gets out a photo album filled with pictures of her, Bobby, and Ronnie Anne together] Because! He's literally Ronnie Anne's brother! He said he could never date someone who's related to someone who hurt someone he's related to! Or whatever that means!

 **Lincoln:** [bewildered] What in the world? [regains composure] I had no clue she was Bobby's sister! Like, at all! [under his breath] Besides, wouldn't have cared either way. [starts to head upstairs]

 **Lori:** [aware of what LIncoln said] ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT!! YOU'RE DEAD, TWERP!!

[Lori screams angrily, and lunges towards Lincoln, much like a lion would at its prey. Then, Lincoln quickly looks behind his back with an "Uh oh!" expression. The scene resulting in a dust cloud going all around the living room. Offscreen, it clears up, and Lincoln slides across the floor and crashes into a wall, most likely from Lori. She pounces on him again, and another dust cloud occurs, but for longer.]

[A couple hours later, the other Loud kids come home.]

 **Lynn:** [chants] We're number one! We're number one! We're number-

 **Lola:** [annoyed] We get the point, Lynn. Your team won the last game in the season. You didn't have to chant that obnoxiously the whole way home.

[They all then see the dust cloud going around the room.]

 **Luna:** What in the blazes is going on?

[They all (sans Lily, 'cause baby reasons) try to break up the fight, holding back an ill-tempered Lori from an extremely battered and bruised Lincoln.]

 **Lori:** [snarls] LET ME GO RIGHT NOW!! I'M STILL NOT DONE WITH THAT LITTLE BASTARD!!

 **Luna:** Not until you calm down and leave our bro alone!

[Cut to a few minutes later, where Lori's tied to the end of the stair banister with Lola's pageant sashes and struggling to break free. Pan over to show the others consoling LIncoln.]

 **Leni:** [extremely worried; shakes Lincoln] Are you OK, Lincy?!

 **Lynn:** [extremely worried] Come on, Linc! [shakes him violently] Don't you die on me, bro! Don't you _dare_ die on me! [lets him go]

 **Lisa:** Let me just check his pulse and... [puts her hand and head against Lincoln's chest until she feels his heartbeat] It's OK. He's still alive. Just unconscious, is all.

[Luna picks up and carries her knocked out brother in her arms, as the bunch head upstairs, shooting nasty looks at Lori, who has stopped struggling against the sashes. Lola comes back down and unties Lori.]

 **Lola:** These are _my_ sashes, thank you very much. [heads back up]


	3. chapter 3

[Half an hour later, cut to a 1st-person view of Lincoln slowly regaining consciousness. When he wakes up, he sees that he's in his room, with all his sisters (minus Lori) by his side with worried looks.]

 **Lincoln:** [groans] My head... Where am I?

 **Leni:** In your room, silly. [ruffles his hair]

 **Luna:** You were conked out for a _while_ , bro.

 **Lynn:** Yeah, after the thrashing Lori gave you earlier.

 **Lisa:** Speaking of said incident, what was it all about, anyways?

[The 9 slightly lean towards Lincoln for their answer.]

 **Lincoln:** Basically... Lori got mad about how I stood up to a bully today at school, who's been bothering me for months.

 **Lana:** Yeah, not following.

 **Lincoln:** Turns out, the bully was actually Bobby's little sister, and her name's Ronnie Anne.

[They process this information for a few moments.]

 **Luan:** _Wow._ That's low, even for Lori's standards.

 **Lola:** Guess she cares a whole lot more about her _precious boo-boo bear_ than her own brother.

 **Lincoln:** I know! The one time I stand up for myself, and I get beaten almost to death for it! [scoffs and pouts; notices that everyone but Lily's gone] Hey, where'd everyone go?

[Lily crawls up to Lincoln's bed and lays on Lincoln's chest, with him gently patting her back. Cut to the Santiago residence, where Ronnie Anne goes into the kitchen.]

 **Ronnie Anne:** Wonder if there's anything to eat around here...

[She opens the fridge to reveal 8 angry Loud sisters inside. They all proceed to jump her, resulting in a dust cloud. It clears up to show Ronnie tied to a chair.]

 **Ronnie Anne:** Who _are_ you people? And how long were you in my fridge?

 **Lynn:** We're the sisters of the guy you've been bullying for months.

 **Lisa:** And our unbridled fury was what was keeping us warm in your frozen sustenance receptacle.

[Everyone looks at Lisa confusingly.]

 **Lisa:** [deadpan] A refrigerator, is what I'm talking about, if anyone was wondering.

 **Ronnie Anne:** [nervously] W-wh-what are you talking about? [laughs nervously]

 **Luna:** You know _exactly_ what we're talking about, mate! Lincoln Loud, _our_ brother.

 **Luan:** We don't like how you've been treating our brother, one single bit.

 **Ronnie Anne:** [laughs] What? That buck toothed geek with the white hair's related to you? [guffaws controllably]

 **Lynn:** [gets right up in Ronnie's face] You listen here and you listen good. If any of us find out that you're still beating up on our bro, I _will_ be coming for you. We _all_ will be coming for you. And I promise you, that we'll be coming with more than just our bare hands next time, and that you and my prized aluminum bat will be more acquainted. And, write this down in your little book; the Louds are _not_ to be screwed with! Capiche?!

[Ronnie fearfully nods yes.]

 **Lola:** So glad we could resolve this _so easily_. [gives Ronnie a death stare]

[The sisters untie Ronnie Anne and go back home.]

 **Ronnie Anne:** [waits until they're all gone; scoffs] Don't know what _they_ were talking about. Great thing I took acting classes last year. _Just_ like how I convinced Roberto to break up with that blonde broad...


	4. chapter 4

[Vanzilla pulls up into the driveway, with Mr. and Mrs. Loud getting out.]

 **Lynn Sr.:** Phew, that was a long time being away from the house for a day.

[The two walk into the house. There, the kids (minus Lincoln and Lori) are sitting on the living room couch.]

 **Leni:** Hey, Mom! Hey, Dad!

 **Rita:** Hey, kids. You know... it's great to be back home and finally come up in a story.

[All of a sudden, everyone hears two people yelling at each other, with the feminine one cursing multiple times.]

 **Luna:** Sounds like Linc and Lori are at it again.

 **Lana:** Better stop them before they get physical.

[The siblings were about to go upstairs until...]

 **Lynn Sr.:** [stops them] Up-up-up! Just let me and your mother take care of this, girls.l

[The two parents head upstairs to see what all the fuss is about in Lincoln's room.]

 **Rita:** [opens the door] Lincoln! Lori!

[Neither of them had heard their parents enter the room, since they were still focused on arguing with each other.]

 **Lynn Sr.:** [clears throat] AHEM! Me and your mother are talking to you!

[With one last resort, Rita stood between the quarreling siblings.]

 **Lincoln:** Hey, Mom. Thank goodness you're here. [agitated] Maybe you and Dad can tell _Lori_ [points at her] here not to force me into a date with some girl who's been BULLYING me for months!

 **Lori:** Oh yeah?! Why don't you Lincoln to stop being a stubborn little prick and just get the date over with?!

 **Lincoln:** I'd rather lick the pointiest cactus on Earth than go out with that dirtbag!

 **Rita:** [livid] ALRIGHT, THAT'S ENOUGH FROM BOTH OF YOU! [grabs each sibling's ear] We're all going to have a _very long_ talk, right now! [walks towards her and Lynn Sr.'s bedroom]

 **Lincoln and Lori:** [in pain] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!


	5. chapter 5

[Cut to the Loud parents standing in front of Lincoln and Lori on the living room couch.]

 **Rita:** [stern] Would any of you two care to explain what all of this fighting's about?

 **Lincoln:** [raises his hand] I'll go first, Mom. [clears throat] You see-

 **Lori:** Hey, he's just-

 **Lynn Sr.:** [clears throat] Your brother is talking right now, Lori. Don't interrupt.

[Lori pouts and glares at LIncoln with fiery pupils.]

 **Lincoln:** [glances at Lori] So, as I was saying, it had all started at school during lunch today...

[Dissolve to Lincoln being mocked by his classmates in the cafeteria.]

 **Lincoln:** [voice-over] These so-called friends of mine kept on teasing me about being in a relationship with Ronnie Anne, this girl that's been bullying me for months.

 **Rita:** And why is it you didn't tell your teacher or principal about this girl?

[Cut to a split-screen of Lincoln telling on Ronnie Anne to both Mrs. Johnson and Mr. Huggins.]

 **Lincoln:** I did, and they gave me the same response; "It's because she likes you, LIncoln," when it's so obviously not the case!

[Cut back to the cafeteria.]

 **Lincoln:** Anyway, these jerks were teasing me, and then I ranted about how much I didn't want anything to do with Ronnie to them. Next, Ronnie Anne was right behind me and heard the start of my rant. Then, I told her off, saying how much I despised her and that I wasn't gonna take any more of her abuse.

 **Lynn Sr.:** [raises one brow] Anything else, son?

 **Lincoln:** After that, she ran out of the cafeteria, then the rest of the day went relatively well... That is, until I got home.

 **Rita:** [notices Lincoln's bruised body] Actually, now that I think about it, you didn't get those scars from Ronnie Anne today at school?

 **Lincoln:** Actually, I got them from the person sitting right next to me. [points at Lori] The very moment I got home too, in fact, and she was spatting out some grade-A baloney about my bully being related to her boyfriend. And, get this, she wants me to _make up_ with the dirtbag. I don't think so! I'm not gonna make up with someone who poured nacho cheese down my pants. Ronnie Anne's the reason why I had to bathe in ointment for the whole weekend!

 **Leni:** [off-screen] Yeah! All of us can vouch for him.

[Pan over to the other siblings eavesdropping on the conversation from the stair banister. Lynn lightly punches Leni's arm.]

 **Lynn:** Thanks a lot for blowing our cover.

 **Rita:** Girls, just... Just go upstairs right now. We're with your brother and sister right now.

[The group reluctantly left the stairway and headed to their rooms.]

 **Rita:** [to Lori] OK, now that we've heard Lincoln's side of the story, let's hear yours, Lori.


	6. chapter 6

_Now that I'm thinking about it, I'm considering making a separate story that takes place during this one, where the Loud Parents decide to enroll Lincoln Lori for some anger management classes, specifically one dedicated to resolving sister and brother disputes. (May feature main sibling characters from Dexter's Lab, Grojband, etc. as the classmates) You can tell me what you guys think in the review section. Anyways, on with the next chapter._

 **Lori:** Alright, so today after school, I was walking on my way home with my friends, and then I got my daily 3:00 phone call from Bobby. When I answered it, he said he "didn't want to date someone who was related to the dirtbag brother of mine that hurt his sister", Ronnie Anne, who he claims to have been bawling her eyes out ever since she got home from school.

 **Lynn Sr.:** Uh huh... Keep going.

 **Lori:** So, after the call ended, I ran all the way home by myself and drowned my sorrows in ice cream buckets and Twilight movies for the rest of the afternoon. I was in literal depression. Until the little _bastard_ [stares daggers at Lincoln] that started it all came home. So enraged over my loss of my Boo-Boo Bear, I took out all my anger on him. Several hours worth of it, now that I'm thinking back, and I thought it was well-deserving for him too.

 **Lynn Sr.:** [calmly] Lori, let me tell you something. Come with me for a minute. [walks her over to the dinner table; angrily] Don't you EVER, in your life, put your hands on your brother _again._ You should obviously know better than that. And if I catch you doing it a second time, [unbuckles his belt and points to it] This specific article of clothing of mine is going to be very acquainted with your skin, alright?

[Lori fearfully nods in response.]

 **Lynn Sr.:** [turns to the open window of the eavesdropping siblings, sans Lily] And what I'm telling Lori goes for all of you too.

[As a result, the eight siblings rushed into separate directions, some of them even bumping into each other once or twice. Cut back to the living room, where Lincoln and Rita are.]

 **Rita:** [calmly] Sweetie, you did the right thing in the matter here. You stood up for yourself and taught this "Ronnie Anne" some respect. My man's already growing up so fast. [hugs him] Also, it would be best for you and Lori if you don't try to aggravate her in any way for the time being, alright?

 **Lincoln:** Alright, Mom. I'll try to.

[Cut to Lincoln and Lori in their respective bedrooms. The former's taking a load off by playing some "Muscle Fish" on his phone. The latter is facing the window on her bed with a dreadful scowl.]

 **Lori:** [thoughts] I can't freakin' believe this! That heart-breaking twerp of a brother gets out practically scot-free, and _I_ ' _m_ the one threatened with Dad's belt! What a giant load of-

[She loses her train of thought when she sees Leni packing up all of her belongings.]

 **Lori:** [bitterly] And where do you think _you're_ going?

 **Leni:** I'm not gonna be in the same room with someone who nearly beat my little brother to death. Imay not be on the same level of thinking as everyone else in this house, but even _I_ won't go that far after a break-up. So, if you'll excuse me, [puts her bed on a dolly] I'm gonna be bunking with Luna and Lynn for a while. Hmph! [moves out of the room]

 **Lori:** Well, joke's on you! I got the whole place to myself now, while you're in a room of three. Yeah... Not as smart as you think, _Leni_.


	7. Announcement

Currently, this story is now done. But, on the positive side, I will be continuing it with "Siblin' Management Class" a sort of... Part 2 to Siblin' Friction. Stay tuned for it, folks.


End file.
